Title: Still Scared
From: headbo (Kelly)
Sent: 3/25/2002 6:37 PM

Just a post for myself so I will remember how scared I am.

I went to the doctor today and had a chest x-ray. Also had a lot of other tests done to see what damage I have done to myself. I go back to the doctor next Monday for the results, but deep in my heart I know that my tests will come back normal and that my sister will be okay.

Isn't amazing how you can smoke your face off for years and not even think about what you are doing to yourself and then live in fear after quitting.

I don't ever want to be this scared again, so I will NEVER TAKE ANOTHER PUFF.

Kelly

Nic Free - 2 weeks, 3 days, 21 hours, 37 minutes, 9 seconds

From: headbo (Kelly)
Sent: 4/7/2002 9:16 PM

Dear Quit Friends:

The bus finally came! There were a few anxious moments waiting at the bus stop, but I am very proud to get on board.

I know the ride to the next stop might be a little bumpy, but it will be much better than waiting at the bus stop. Next stop, I am hopping in the bronze limo. It looks like it may be too crowded by the time I get there, so I just may lease a new one -- why not -- after all I do have a new lease on life!

Feeling a little giddy right now!

Your Quit Friend,

Kelly

I have chosen not to smoke for 1 Month 12 Minutes 14 Seconds. Cigarettes not smoked: 620. Money saved: C$170.55.

Title: "Turned Green Today, this is my first post"
From: kito40 (Kim)
Sent: 4/12/2002 8:27 PM

I just read the courtesies, and I apologise to everyone for not replying back. I'm still new here and will finally clue into all the rules.........lol. Thank-you all for your support this is an excellent site. I sit here and read alot of posts.

My surgery is coming up fast and I'm getting very nervous. Wednesday is not far away. My power of attorney is finished and I've advised my husband of my wishes if anything should go wrong............but I'm going to be fine! and I'm going to be cancer free!...............and the best thing of all is...........I don't smoke anymore and I will never take another puff! I can't do to my right lung what I did to my left one...........

Goodbye left lung and goodbye cancer!!!!!

Kim

Title: I'm Upset - Surgery Postponed
From: headbo (Kelly)
Sent: 4/16/2002 8:56 PM

I can only imagine how disappointed you are. I know how disappointed I am after taking weeks of psyching myself that everything will be all right. Deep down in my heart, I know it will be.

Just think that in only one more week, the surgery will be done, you will be cancer free and we have the rest of our lives to be smoke free and put this nightmare behind us.

Hugs from your sister,
Headbo

Title: Prayers Requested
From: headbo (Kelly)
Sent: 4/22/2002 9:53 PM

Hi all --

I'm crying my eyes out as I post this message. Just got a phone call that my sister's surgery has been moved up. It will take place tomorrow at 8:00 a.m. EST rather than 10:00 a.m. That means she has to be at hospital at 5:00 a.m. I thought I was so prepared for this. I've known since March 7th that this was going to happen, but reality just knocked really hard once again.

I'm not really sure why I am crying. I do believe the surgery will be successful and things will turn out good, but it is just upsetting. I can't even imagine how she is feeling.

I just ask for your prayers that she will have a speedy recovery and that life will return to normal very soon. Life was so normal not that long ago and it is amazing how quickly things can change.

To all you fellow quitters, be proud of your quit and keep it. You've done the right thing and I'll pray for each of you that you never have to go through this.

Kelly

I have chosen not to smoke for 1 Month 2 Weeks 1 Day 52 Minutes 23 Seconds. Cigarettes not smoked: 920. Money saved: C$253.20.

Title: HELLO! I'M BACK!!!!!
From: kito40 (Kim)
Sent: 4/30/2002 2:54 PM

Hello all my Freedom Friends,

Well one week after having my left lung removed I sit here typing away as usual on the computer. Recovery has been remarkable for me, I have come so far. I am still in a fair amount of pain and it especially hurts when I try to cough or laugh. I get sleepy alot too. I have one nasty gash across my back, I finally saw it yesterday. I am staying at my parents for a week before I go home, Mom is a retired nurse which is helpful. Nobody is home all day at my house anyways. I get alittle winded after going up the stairs but that will pass in time. Anyways I'm glad to be back here, must catch up on my posts.

Joel, don't worry about relasp...............it isn't going to happen. I quit not only because I had too, its also because I wanted too and did for some time. I don't have my quit meter here at my parents, so I'm not sure how long it is...........something like 1M3W

Take Care All, Glad to be Back

Kim

I don't have any of my gifs here either..........lol

From: headbo (Kelly)
Sent: 5/7/2002 11:01 PM

Hi all --

Thought I'd post to let you know I have reached two months. It is really hard to believe that the time has gone so fast. I still think about smoking here and there, but there is a difference between thinking about it and craving it. I definitely don't crave anymore and the thoughts are getting few and far between. The smell is actually disgusting and I get grossed out when I have to sit beside a smoker in a waiting room or anywhere else.

My apologies for not posting responses to everyone else's posts. I feel a little guilty for not giving back the support I have received, so . . . . .

CONGRATULATIONS to everyone on their personal milestones and WELCOME to everyone who is new here. It is as easy as taking it one day at a time and knowing you can never have another puff -- not even one.

Kelly

I have chosen not to smoke for 2 Months 1 Hour 59 Minutes 31 Seconds. Cigarettes not smoked: 1221. Money saved: C$335.96.

Title: A CHUCKLE
From: headbo (Kelly)
Sent: 5/19/2002 12:17 PM

Hi my smoke free friends --

My husband mentioned to me that he had a dream he was smoking. When my son heard him say that, he said:

"That's not a dream dad, that's a nightmare!"

I got a good chuckle!

Kelly
I have chosen not to smoke for 2 Months 1 Week 4 Days 15 Hours 19 Minutes 7 Seconds. Cigarettes not smoked: 1452. Money saved: C$399.51.

Kim - Age 44

Kim's Story Fortunate To Be Alive To Tell About It! June 26, 2002

Hi there, I'm glad you're taking the time to come and visit. Let me introduce myself, my name is Kim. I was born on December 17, 1957, in Ontario, Canada. I was born to two wonderful parents who were both smokers. In March of 1960, my brother Tad was born and in October of 1961, my sister Kelly was born.

I started smoking at age 12, stealing cigarettes from my parents and also stealing packs from the grocery and drug store (stealing.......its true, and I don't like to admit it). But I was a nicotine addict at 12, already needing to get a fix no matter how I got it.........sad isn't it? My sister started smoking also, my brother never did.

At age 24, I quit for 1 month, but that one pack I kept in my dresser drawer was just too tempting.

Both my parents quit smoking in 1985. That year I married Tony in June.

My Grandpa always had a cigarette, cigar or pipe in his mouth and lived to the ripe old age of 90. He died of congestive heart failure. My grandmother who never smoked a day in her life, died at 72 of bowel cancer. My aunt who is 76, has smoked for well over 50 years and is and still going strong today.

In July of 1990, I quit again, this time it lasted a year and a half. After having a few drinks at Christmas, I asked my husband for a puff and of course one lead to another and I was back to smoking full time again.

In June of 2001, I tried again, it lasted 3 days and in January of 2002 I tried yet again.......lasting maybe 4 days. I didn't really want to quit. Well I did and I didn't . Look at my grandfather, look at my aunt, my parents have no ill-effects, they are in their seventies now. Nothing is going to happen to me, I'm not a heavy smoker.

In March of 2002, I was going in to have some surgery. I was sent for pre-op tests, blood work, chest x-ray, EKG.......etc. My doctor called on March 7 to say something had showed up on my x-ray. There was a spot in my left lung. Oh my God, what does that mean exactly? I was to go and see the specialist the next day. March 7 was the last day I put a cigarette to my mouth. It was also the day my sister quit.

I saw the specialist the next day and was told it was cancer and it was very close to the heart. If it had reached the heart there was nothing they could do. When I looked at the cat scan it looked like it was touching the heart, thats how close it was. The only alternative I had to beat this was to have my left lung removed. What? Me? Cancer? Lung removed? ......no can't be, I'm too young for this.......

The next month and a half was very busy. I had a cat scan, bone scan and ultra sound, all were negative, which was good news, it was nowhere else in my body. I had stress tests, lung functions tests and I was beginning to think there wasn't anymore blood for them to take. I passed all the tests and was ready for surgery. My Doctor told me he didn't know if it had spread to my lymph nodes and he wouldn't know until he was in there.

On April 23rd they wheeled me into the operating room at 8:20 a.m. Five hours later I was wheeled out of surgery and placed in Intensive Care on a breathing machine. I was not only missing a lung, I was also missing a rib. Fortunately it hadn't spread to the lymph nodes.

Kim in ICU on April 23, 2002

I was hooked up to so many tubes and wires, but I was breathing on my own the next day. I was getting stronger everyday and everyday they would take a tube or wire off. On day five, I was tube and wire free and on day 6, I was released. I went to my Mom and Dad's for two weeks as my Mom is a retired nurse. I had home care for almost a month. A nurse came in once a day and changed the dressing on the incision.

I tire very easily, I can't exert myself in the summer humidity, as it makes it difficult to breathe, and I can't lift anything heavy. I have to do things slowly or my heart starts to beat fast. There is still a section at the top of the incision that is taking a long time to heal. Every night hot compresses are applied to help the healing. My left side is numb from the incision around to my underarm area and it really hurts to sneeze. It will be months before I'm fully recuperated.

Left lung incision site

Don't ever think this can't happen to you. I thought the same thing and look what happened to me. I'm one of the fortunate ones ...................... why? I'll never know the answer to that and I'm certainly not out of the woods yet either. I have to be checked every six months for the next three years.

Kim's Loving Sister Kelly

My sister Kelly, who took the news very hard, was trying to find information on lung cancer when she found this site just after I was diagnosed. First off she came across the " Wall of Remembrance " (a site I still cannot visit as it upsets me too much) and then on to Whyquit and Freedom . The people, education and support here is tremendous. It's the only way to quit and keep it.

You can quit! Don't let what happened to me, happen to you. It can happen to anyone and at any age. I used to believe I was above the warnings on cigarette packs, but you know what?.......they are true........CIGARETTES KILL, they almost killed me! I'm just thankful I can tell you this story instead of my family having to post it in the "Wall of Remembrance."

Title: Kim is Bronze Today!!!!!
From: kito40 (Kim)
Sent: 6/7/2002 10:40 AM

Today is a wonderful day for me, I've been nicotine free for 3 Months! And what a 3 months it has been. As most of you know I was diagnosed with lung cancer on March 7. It was also the last day I put a cigarette to my mouth. The rest of March and April was very busy with Dr. appts, tests, tests and more tests. I was wondering if I had any more blood for them to take. On April 23, I had my left lung removed, hoping it had not spread to my lymph nodes. I was in intensive care for 3 days with every tube and wire there possibly could have been. I was very strong and was healing quickly and so was released early. I went for my checkup the other day and the lymph nodes were negative. So I'm very happy to say "I AM CANCER FREE"

I'm certainly not out of the woods yet, I must be checked every 6 months for the next 3 years.

But I'm one of the very fortunate ones, why? I'll never know the answer to that. I just want everyone to know that it CAN happen to you and at any age. Hold on to your quits everyone your life does depend on it. And for my friend Gayle, I know you are lurking out there........you can do it, you are one of the strongest persons I know, don't let nicotine control you. So that being said.........I'm celebrating today!!!!!

3 months today!!!!